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Every F*cking Day of My Life

Married at 16 years – with 18 years of violence following – left Wendy terrified. She summoned the courage to deal with her husband the only way she knew possible.
Originally as One Minute to Nine, this documentary finally arrives at HBO with a somewhat more in-your-face title – and, in a stark, spare way that has come to characterize the pay channel, delivers a pretty bracing wallop.
A harrowing portrait of domestic abuse, the project draws heavily on video shot by the dead abuser, as his wife, Wendy Maldonado, spends her final days of freedom before going to jail for his murder.
The net result is every bit as chilling and depressing as one might expect. Includes captions for the hearing impaired.

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  3. I am glad I stumbled upon this. Thank you for this. What a heartbreaking story. I am angry that they had to spend any time in jail for this at all but I guess I get it. I think our justice system really needs to understand domestic violence. It made me angry when the judge said something like “what we call domestic violence”. That is what it is! The first thing people say in these situations is “why didn’t she leave?” The answer is this: the most dangerous time in these relationships are when the abused does leave. That’s when women end up dead. People stay in these relationships to survive, which surviving is what people are supposed to do. In this case, someone had to die to leave this relationship. So all those years of abuse and the system failing this family, insult to injury, now a woman and her son have to go to prison and are forever convicted felons. Every system in this country failed this family. I hope that they do ok from now on, with this burden out of their life. I wish I knew how we could change things. Cops can shoot black men in their back and not go to prison or even lose their job but a woman and child can not defend themselves against their abuser. It’s ridiculous.

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  13. If there were ever a case of justifiable homicide, this would be it.

  14. Women that defend themselves in such a way and finally deal with their abusers should be given a medal, not sent to prison. All those who scream that they should not kill their abusers, because it is not right have never been abused and do not ask themselves, where the justice was for the abused.

  15. MEN ARE A DISEASE.

    NAMETHEPROBLEM.COM

  16. Wendy will be released in March 2016. A Go Fund Me page has been set up to buy her a mobile home to live in with her children. If you want to help here’s the link. I found this by reading a facebook page set up to help her – https://www.facebook.com/groups/360219895067/

  17. Another example of how the justice system,is a sham,in most cases the violence could have been prevented and dealt with.All over the world the story repeats it self.What amazes me the most is how we as a developed society,”democratic” and free,allows this to happen.The victims when they defend themselves are sentenced like criminals,and most cases the perpetrator walks away,in this case Aron is where he should be and God sent him to rot where he belongs.Maybe instead of going to other countries to supposedly fight for human rights and freedom, and criticizing the treatment of women in other nations…..take a GOOD look and see the the pathetic justice system,we live in,and those who are here to protect and serve,obviously their priorities are not in order !!!!!!

  18. Apparently you didn’t watch this documentary, or else you’d understand a little bit more why women stay.

  19. I cannot believe that those neighbors and the people who witnessed Aaron beating Wendy, dragging her across the gravel, pushing her up against the car window, etc. did not say ANYTHING. That is despicable. Her neighbors heard that man beating her hundreds of times and did NOTHING. There is no excuse for that. It is so easy to pick up the phone and call the police. They would have come and taken him away. There is no reason why this woman had to endure that torture for as many years as she did. It is so so so important to help those who cannot help themselves, it is so important to say something if you see something.

    • Men are sociopaths and hate women… male violence is the biggest global epidemic there is.

      NAMETHEPROBLEM.COM

      • You seem like MRA propaganda spam. Men are not the problem. Mental health and society are the problem. Go spew your garbage on 4chan or in some place where you can feed trolls.

  20. I cant believe this poor woman and her son are serving prison sentences when all they done was defend themselves from someone that inflicted so much torture and pain on them and who would have more than likely ended up killing them. They are not a threat to society at all and were only driven to what they done by many years of extreme fear. i just realised that randy may have been released by now as it said he was eligable for parole in 2011,im praying he was released, but to think that his poor mother has served 8 years and still has 2 years to serve is unthinkable.The whole of that family has gone through such a nightmare and i just pray that the powers to be in the usa see sense and release her asap.I live in the uk and our justice system is far from perfect but in this case im sure our judges would have seen sense and given a suspended sentence at the most.

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  23. I am sorry for this family. Good people trapped in a horrible situation.
    It left me to wonder what the consequences to the family would have been if the mother and son went in that night, hacked the dad’s feet off, then his hands. Would they have gotten more time, or less?
    I was born into a house rife with violence (albeit not to this scale of DV); i was the fourth and last child. My mom finally got out when i was 3.

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  25. Wendy and Randy should be free. They should have never been sentenced to prison. I don’t think they would have been in Germany where I live. How could anyone punish this woman for what she did? Not only did she and her children suffer terrible abuse which should be considered mitigating circumstances by any sane person, but it also seems like this guy was an absolute sociopath whose death is a good, good thing.
    I feel really bad saying that because I don’t like to think that anyone deserves death, but if there are people out there who do, this man definitely deserved to die. And the world is a better place because he is no longer in it.

    I hope Wendy and her children will be able to recover from all this ordeal, and find happiness in their lives. God bless them.

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  27. randy asked ” am i allow to cry now”. Gutwrenching

  28. I have no sympathy for people who are abused partners. Get up and leave or shut the hell up. If someone hits you, and you stay, the next time you get beaten, its your fault.

    • Men are shit.

      NAMETHEPROBLEM.COM

    • It is clear that you have not gotten your first pubic hair and still live with your mommy so do everyone a favor save your mentally deficient comments for your blow up doll. The thought that someone like you exists makes me vomit in my mouth. Even though you clearly read at a 3rd grade level, Hopefully you will comprehend this last Quote…just for you “David”.

      “Nothing in the world is more DANGEROUS than sincere IGNORANCE and conscientious stupidity.”

      Sincerely,

      Karma

  29. VetoList.com

  30. what I don’t get is this: how is it possible that in the US it is allowed to kill a complete stranger if you feel your life is threatened but if you do it with a spouse who has been abusing you for nearly two decades and is definitely a threat to your own life AND to your children – then you go to prison???

  31. I’m so shocked that none of the neighbours ever did anything? Very sad documentary.

  32. Before watching this documentary, I thought (having been a victim of abuse myself) similar to some other people on here that she should’ve fought back or fled for her children’s sake. It is instinctive to fight for your survival or to run away from pain. And I was completely on-board with another viewer when they wrote that Wendy had a choice, while the boys did not.
    However, after watching, I came to a very sick conclusion and analogy for what happened to this family, especially Wendy…
    Like the frog that is thrown into a hot pot of water and jumps out immediately, if abuse comes as a surprise, one would normally act instinctively and “fight or flight”, but this sick man coaxed the frog into a cool pot of water and cruelly turned the heat up slowly, making it cook alive thinking that with each increase in degree, that that was the norm.
    I felt sick to my stomach upon this conclusion I had drawn…
    I am still left trying to wrap my head around what I just saw… A human being’s, essentially an animal’s very instinct was slowly wiped out… Her spirit was so crushed that she would not even trust that anyone in their right mind would find her and her son innocent…
    I must say that seeing the murder scene even gave me, an outsider in space and time, a sense of relief.
    I hope (not pray) that that sick, twisted soul has completely vanished from existence somehow, that there was even no hell to greet him…

  33. That deer scene was really disturbing. Talk about red flags.

  34. Axe to the head…..Axe to the head…… lookin like a fool with an axe to the head

  35. Has anyone from the Jury even looked at the home videos including this documentary? WTF?

  36. I am going to write a letter to Obama…if anyone else can find time please do the same.

  37. That’s ridiculous, there are so many white woman in america who get away with killing their abusive husband…such as Amber Cummings and Barbara Sheehan…in the same country!! Apparently they both claimed the “battered-woman” defence. Why couldn’t Wendy and Rand use the same defence in the same country?? Wendy and Randy were subjected to abuse far longer than Amber Cummings who killed her husband after a few years..Wendy had 19! Also the other two women planned and plotted to kill their husbands murder, and shot him. Wendy and Randy made the split second decision and were extremely open about it format he start. There IS a defence in the US for this situation…battered-woman defence….and it’s been used for years before Wendy. Why wasn’t Wendy allowed this defence.

    Why didn’t the judge himself speak to a higher body about this case. Amber and Barbara clearly got this defence which is how it should be. The law has no common sense, I thought that was the whole point of a judge…i.e. to judge! What the hell do they get paid so much money for to sit on their ass and give a verdict that a computer could have generated?

    They should have gone higher. Glad aaron is dead, and I wish he could have died in a way that expressed the pain that all his victims felt. They need to have a proper program in place for victims of abuse. Women don’t even know what evidence they need to convict a man. That’s the problem, you go to the police and the worst he’ll get is a few years in jail and when he gets out he’ll kill you and the kids. It’s happened to so many wman who have tried to go to the police, so I don’t blame her for just killing him. In reality, he wouldn’t have got put in prison without substantial evidence and he would have come back and killed them for sure. Wendy you a string and brave person who put up with this for longer than you should have.

    • As Charles Dickens once wrote, “The law is an ass.”
      That’s why judges don’t usually dispense any real justice.
      And as we all know, life just ain’t fair.

  38. I agree Joe – and Randy did mention that they prayed before they actually went in and killed Aaron.

    He didn’t really elaborate on this but you get a sense that they were trying to figure out what to do….one of the most famous men in the Bible was guilty of murder – Moses.

    Aaron had NO RESPECT for ANY LIFE – and sometimes drastic actions are required.

    I think that Wendy did the right thing here….and while I know that murder is wrong, and I get that people simply cannot understand if they have not lived through anything like this (I have) – this level of abuse is the worst I have ever seen – and Aaron was clearly demented and sick!
    I honestly think that this is the ONLY way this was going to stop….with the laws we have about this in our country – they are ineffective.

    The police were there ON THIS NIGHT – told by the neighbors to go back and they DID NOT!

    I imagine Wendy was probably just sorry that the idea had never came to her before this night.

    I am concerned about the boys – I doubt they will become abusers BUT – what if Aaron truly had something wrong with him that could be genetic?

    What if they have any of these tendencies?

    ===================
    It is a REALLY sad thing that our country cannot find a way to deal with things like this, and that this mother has to pay such a high price for finally being able to protect her children from a monster that claimed to love all of them.

    Even in the face of knowing that they now must pay for their crime – you could finally see a glimmer of hope in their eyes – to finally be rid of the torture.

  39. I didn’t see or hear (other) than a hanging sign on the kitchen wall with the words “Christ” but not mention about God what’s overever, except in a curse way. When families a brought up without a concept of God they loose life value. I saw how he kicked the deer and thats how he valued humans too, including his family. If they (yes, all) seeked God in any way or form, this could be avoid it. Yes, I know somebody going to critize me for mention God, but is a way to change people without seeking useless, profesional or govermental help. The husband’s problem was spiritual. Yes, there still hope for this family, even while their mom is in jail.

    • The poor boy talks in the fourth part about praying and praying and praying… when the police left and before they killed him.

  40. wendy is such a stong person all my respect for her

  41. He was a cruel sadistic poor excuse for a human being. My heart goes out to her and her children. May they find the peace they deserve.

  42. Ok, I’m not gonna watch.  Just thinking about abuse makes me feel sick and helpless.  As a man, I’d just want to kill him myself…torture him to death.  See the horrible things it does to my brain?  Nope, not gonna watch.

  43. angry title for this doc.

  44. Comment?!!! I could write a book on how I feel about this! Wendy has been given a sentence of jail when she should have been given a medal! It’s just a shame that Aaron didn’t suffer the same amount of pain for the years that his wife and children did before he drew his last breath! I wonder what kind of sentence he would have been given if he had actually killed his wife. Probably much less. He didn’t want to kill her. Where’s his fun in that! He wanted to torture and torment, dominate and be feared! To feel powerful and in control. I know of these pathetic small men who lord their strength and ignorance over defenseless women, children and animals. And what about all the people who knew what was happening and looked the other way! By their silence and avoidance they condone his behaviour. It takes courage to confront these low lifes. People are afraid they might have to give up something of their own to get involved, which they are mostly not willing to do! It is much easier to look the other way. And when the law does, why shouldn’t they!?  If she needs help to get out who is going to help her? Not me, let someone else, I’ve got my own family to think about. Let the government, social services etc…and the nightmare goes on and on and this is the end result. This family will never recover. Those children are damaged for life! Their pain will never end. That SOB deserved everything he got and more if it were possible! When are we ever going to stop tolerating violence under any circumstances and accept and teach it as totally unacceptable behaviour that has consequences? May this family and all the others going through the same ordeal finally find the peace they never had and are so entitled to and deserve!….. And we call ourselves evolved!

  45. I truly believe psychological traps are far more dangerous than any physical harm and this is exactly the case we see here. 

    The horror in her eyes in visible in EVERY video and her kids’ absolute fear. I was gulping down my tears towards the end.

    What I don’t understand is the apathy from people who CLEARLY knew what was going on – they could have helped her. Aaron seemed to ONLY inflict abuse on his family, he never (thankfully) substantiated  his evil on outsiders as far as we know and therefore they should have gathered the monster was hell bent on just control. The tears they are streaming are simply guilt. Let them flow.

    I won’t pretend I know what this woman felt or her kids went through and I hope to never do so either but if I were her so far down the abuse line – I would have done the same but been ballsier about the acquittal. 

    On a final note, Aaron’s brother – burn.in.hell.with.him. 

    Peace out.

  46. What a load of shit

    • I dont believe al women are like that. Please be careful with your words tart, brain devoted to shopping etc. That is very generalised and offensive. 

  47. I really think there should be a warning about the fawn scene!

  48. My question is if all these people knew what was going on why didn’t any of them try to help her get away? If that was my relative or friend I would wait until the guy was gone and drive up with a truck and take them with me and call the cops and have them watch the family or at least let them know that he may come over and try to hurt them. I would take her to the authorities and file a report so that he would no longer have rights to the kids, etc. One other comment, not to minimize this woman’s pain or fear in staying with her husband, but it’s one thing if you gamble with your life but when you have kids you don’t have the right to gamble with their’s. Honestly if it was me I could see staying if it was just myself because it would only be my life but if or as soon as I had a kid I would leave immediately. There’s no way I would let my kids get hurt or witness me getting hurt. If nothing else she should have stopped him from hurting her kids. This makes it hard for me to feel sorry for her at least in that respect.

    • I know that an acquaintance of mine was in an abuse relationship. I knew that the guy beat her and the children, but I had no idea how bad it was until the guy disappeared after he was about to get arrested for tax fraud. It turned out that it had been absolutely horrific. Her children stayed with me and my family, and we slowly came to learn the entire story. About the guy chasing my acquaintance down the street, about the children trying to do their outmost to protect their mother, and so on.

      As I said before, I had known it was bad. I talked to my acquaintance about it. She did not tell me the truth, she made excuses for the abuser, she begged me not to interfere. I told her I would be there for her no matter what. I said I would help her if she decided to leave him. I promised that we would do everything we could for her and her children.

      However, she said no. She said she didn’t want it.

      Now I understand that she was terrified. I knew she was afraid he would harm the children, her, us,… But the point is: You can’t do anything to help, as an outsider, if the person refuses all help. It’s like when someone is addicted to drugs. You can offer help, you can do everything in your power, but if the central person refuses to cooperate, there really isn’t anything you can do. You can call the police, for example, but most women in abusive situations will then refuse to say anything or make up excuses. The police too can’t interfere in those cases. Nobody else can but the abused.

      That is the tragic part.

  49. This is without a doubt the saddest domestic violence story I have ever encountered.  I agree a million times that he sort of brought it to himself, there was no other way out. Like the judge said, no one wins in these situations and no one gets away with anything.  It is remarkable that she made it all the way to where she is and did not become cynical or anything, you can just see in the video that she is at PEACE, who wouldn’t be after all she went through? Even though she’ll be in jail, she will be a million times better and her kids will be too.  Let’s just hope that the craziness is not genetic in this case and that her kids grow to be good citizens in this society and not repeat the same pattern.  God Bless This Family.

  50. I have lived through this kind of life with an abusive and violent father. I think he got what he deserved. I do not blame her but nevertheless she did murder him and she should have gone another route to breaking free. There are resources for women in abusive relationships that take them and protect them. She could have done like my mother and left him and gone to another state.

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